i hate knowing i would never know you the way i could.
i hate how i must leave when i never really should.
i hate how we meet when time is running out.
i hate the fact that you wear nice hats.
i hate the way your jeans bunch at the ankles.
i hate your oh so lovely candystriped sneaks.
i hate that you're so not my type.
i hate that you have an extra e.
i hate that you make faces when you do.
i hate when your reflection smiles at mine.
i hate when the fingers touch.
i hate that your phone rang at the finale.
i hate that we never got to say goodbye.
i hate that you're charming.
i hate that i nearly almost fell for you.
i hate you.

je, i'll give you the flower cause you think it's cool. maybe someday if amnesia strikes you, you'll see it and remember the girl who couldn't be, the girl you shouldn't meet.
sayonara.

p.s. i watch too much drama-mama, but i know you don't know cause you'll never know enough.

meifen _ spoke at 11:56 AM

dearest adil,

i'll never forget your smile. the crinkle of your face, your pearly whites aflashing. your hair shiny under flourescent lights. I'll never forget the way you sleep. it took a long while for you to fall into slumber as you stare with wide ignorance at the dull cream ceiling. But soon, you learn to sleep when you're tired. i'll always remember the look you give when you know you're wrong. 'tak boleh, sayang'. i love how you're so naive. 'look at the buroh kaka...' you're my angel, my baby boy. the last scene when you bid me goodbye, i know for sure that life can be really good. good bye.

p.s. i love your little nose.

meifen _ spoke at 8:29 PM

i promise never to wish upon a star. when i need it most, the clouds blackened the sky and only satelites come out to play. the real babies are hidden back somewhere between the black void and the black void. i'll never forget deniliquin where the stars kept me company the night through. for once there was more white than black, more hope than disappointment. i'll never forget goodiwindi, where the stars fall down to play with me as i lay wrapped like a baby with my feet warmly chilled. shooting stars rock.

there's so much i haven't done yet and i'm going back. i'm quite psyched to go back cause everytime i do that i get a chance to start afesh, make new resolutions. but this time, i don't hold onto hopes so i can't kill the stars. no one kills the stars but me. i only leave the satelite to wish upon it but it ain't real. Father, Father, help us, send some guidance from above.

note goin out a la n'amie pas: wad happened to
1. fishnets and eyeliner
2. a buried secret
3. golf clubs and geekish golf clothing
4. donning the afro

see, you make plans to kill em.

meifen _ spoke at 1:31 PM

i'm still sick. it's a vicious cycle, i pass it on, recover and someone passes it back to me. oh bleah. i have no long stories for anyone tonight. jus wondering if anyone wants to go for the PROM QUEEN OF ALL PROM QUEEN pageant this sat (21st feb) at EMBASSY. it's $16 , one drink included and rnb the night through. it's beach wear on the 2nd level if you wanna get up there. yep.. so there. btw, abs and chengling are in the pageant. go give some support! drop me a msg if you wanna be heard.

meifen _ spoke at 12:10 AM

i'm sick. sick as can be. i swear i could sit by the toilet and spent the rest of my day puking down the little fishbowl. my nose is stuffier than an enclosed room of post intensive pe students. i'm learning to breathe through my mouth. my throat is ghastly inflamed. it's so bad, i can't swallow or spit. plus, the monthly cramps launched a surprise attack today. and i won't see a doctor. i want to but i won't. it's too far away. i'm too lazy and i figured out the doctor isn't a miracle worker. so i'm kept home for 2 days. i foresee a third. this is bad.

i had a nice dream last night. so real. very very nice. this is good.
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for those that dig william hung (famous for his american idol 3 act) and his 'she bangs' grooves, visit http://williamhung.net . there you can re-watch his smashing hit single or even chat to other fans alike. plus!! there's a forum for the opinionated. check it out. now i'm guilty for being a fat mean bitch.

meifen _ spoke at 2:47 PM